Idealism vs. pragmatism: how people and cultures can heal and grow “Should” One of the first things they teach trainee therapists to look out for is the word “should”. When you sit with people who are struggling, you hear it a lot. “I know I should call my parents...
Different Parenting Styles And Your Relationship Different parenting styles often lead to conflict between couples. Let's look at some of the typical differences between parents, and how to approach them in ways which keep everyone feeling as happy and close as...
This blog post explores the differences between spontaneous and responsive sexual desire, emphasising that women often need more time, emotional connection, and physical contact to ignite their desire. It offers insights on improving communication between partners and...
The Mental Load: The Fantasy “Girls are raised to romanticise taking on the mental load.” Elizabeth Earnshaw For the most part in our culture, girls are brought up to romanticise both the remembering and executing of the tasks that keep a family going....
Here’s a typical situation that happens in many couples after they have children. (I’ve used the pronouns for the most common pattern in straight couples, but this happens in other ways too.) Sex After Kids: Her Experience The kids take up most of her energy.She gets...
Sharing Parenting Responsibilities Did you go into parenthood planning, expecting, or at least hoping for a balanced partnership, with the two of you sharing parenting responsibilities equally? Our generation wants to leave behind the gender roles of old and do...
Sex in marriage and long-term relationships can easily become routine if it happens at all, especially after kids come along. Let’s look at why routine sex in marriage is so common, and what you can do to keep the spark in your connection. Sex In Marriage: How...
Have you ever heard that therapists are only interested in your past? This is a common misconception. Some therapists are particularly interested in in how your past impacts who you are today. My approach takes a balanced view, giving equal importance to all things...
Sex After Parenthood - It’s Good For You And Your Relationship Let's talk about sex after parenthood. Firstly let's remember that good sex is good for you. It's good for each of you as individuals, and it's good for your relationship. If you and your partner...
According to the organisers, International Men’s Day is a day to celebrate the value men bring to the world, their families, and communities. So if you have a man in your life, please let him know how much he means to you today.
What Is The Secret To A Strong Relationship With Your Partner? Knowing Yourself! Want to know the secret to a strong and lasting relationship with your partner? It has to start with you knowing yourself. Firstly you need to be able to recognise your emotions...
Relationship Changes After Parenthood Becoming a parent is a big deal. It usually changes us, and often in ways we don’t expect. This can lead to relationship changes after parenthood that can be really unsettling. We're all used to our various roles, like...
Resentment is a natural response to perceived unfairness, which can strain relationships if not addressed. To deal with resentment towards your partner: understand its root causes, focus on your needs, practice gratitude, and communicate openly about differences....
Help The Uyghur People Do you know what’s been happening to the Uyghur people in China? Uyghurs are ethnically and culturally Turkic people. They live in the area of Central Asia commonly known as East Turkistan. East Turkistan has effectively been occupied by...
The time after a baby arrives is really special. And it can also be challenging, for both mothers and fathers. It's big transition time for each of you personally, as well as for your relationship. To feel the best you can through this time, it's helpful to think...
Couples counselling is amazing, and the thing I hear most often about it is “I wish we’d gone sooner!” But asking for help isn’t always easy, and the prospect of inviting a stranger into our most private conversations can feel quite daunting. It’s very common for one partner to be ready to call a counsellor while the other is still unsure about it. So if you’re wondering how to get your partner to go to couples counselling, you’re not alone. Here are a few pointers to help you if you’ve been struggling with how to get your partner to go to couples counselling.
Happy Thanksgiving! Let’s think about how to show your partner you appreciate them We don’t celebrate Thanksgiving here in the UK, which has always struck me as rather sad. It’s a great opportunity to think about how to show your partner you appreciate them. I know...
It’s World Kindness Day 2020. We know kindness matters. We tell our kids to be kind. But how kind are you, really, to the person you have chosen to spend your life with, on a day-to-day basis? How friendly are you? How generous? How considerate? Do you ask them how...
It's International Stress Awareness Week 2020 This week has been International Stress Awareness Week, so let’s think about your stress levels, how you understand them, and what you can do about them. Stress is what happens when the demands of a situation outstrip our...
Are you starting to feel like it's time to get your sex life back on track after having kids? It’s normal for sex to drop down the agenda when you have a baby, but if it’s been months - maybe even years - you might be starting to worry. Right now, honestly, is sex...
When I was 10 years old, we lived in a house with interesting neighbours. I remember on the day we moved in, the mother walked into our new home and announced, “we mostly keep ourselves to ourselves”. In my experience, people who describe themselves as an open book...
